Today I am going to talk about Love and Support, from God.
Just like yesterday, I woke up at around 9:15am this morning. I had dreams as usual, and some of them were bad dreams, coupled with some light dreams. One of the dark dreams was a word which meant suffering, and pain. For normal people, who do not have a relationship with God, they will view this dream as a nightmare to them. They may say, what matters more than the safety of our lives, and the continuity of our enjoyment in worldly material things? But let me tell you that we Christians think in another way. We live to glorify God on earth, we live to be the servants of God, and we help and do good to our neighbours. Therefore our lives are dedicated to God, and we live to believe and work with God on earth.
Going back to the suffering dream this morning, if I continue to walk the narrow road ahead, there will be possibilities of pain and suffering, to me. But I kept on telling myself, as I had already convinced myself, that God’s work on earth is more important than anything else. The possibility of God’s work on earth or spreading the good news is thus more important than the worldly enjoyment of money, power and wealth, to me.
After that, I started to go to Sunday mass at 12 noon. I arrived early, and during the first 15 minutes of the Mass, I was very emotional to the extent I cried out, because I knew I was a sinner. I could not stop my tears, until the moment came, the moment I felt the feeling of “Support”. That was the moment when the pastor was teaching John 15:9-17 which talked about “Love”. At this time, I suddenly felt a changing of the emotion, from depression to enthusiasm. My tears were gone, and the result was that I had felt some sort of “Support” which enabled me to forget about all the wrongdoings, and gave me a mental uplift so that I could enjoy the following time of the mass with energy and enthusiasm. The important implication of this incident was that, once again, and I firmly believe, God had shown me his “Love” when I was in a mental abyss and He let me endure the depression at the “worldly pace” and performed a “mental miracle”, I believe, to give me a confirmation of His love to me, at the right place and at the right time. Although this “Support” had happened before several times already, none of my previous experiences can match today’s confirmation. It’s worth to know that I do not have a chance to follow Jesus in His ministry, but I am grateful for God’s love to me, and hope to have the great honour to work with Him, on earth. To conclude, I would like to quote a phrase from Matthew 8:18-20
When Jesus saw the crowd around him, he gave orders to cross to the other side of the lake. Then a teacher of the law came to him and said, “Teacher, I will follow you wherever you go.” Jesus replied, “Foxes have dens and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.”
Following Jesus in the past was a difficult act, as “Jesus had no place to lay his head”, and I believe by traveling the narrow road and work with God would not be an easy act either. But I have the drive and boldness, both were blessed and given with my journey with God, so far, and are ready to learn and in future do what I am supposed to do for the betterment of the Church and humanity. Thank God again.