Monthly Archives: June 2018

The True System: Successfulness 29.6.2018

bokeh light

There are times in which we may just give up on the things we are doing. We may be afraid and do not want to take risks. Sometimes we are disheartened. Other times we are content with our present situation. We may not feel comfortable to go the extra step to forgo our comfort zone. We may fear that in this evil age we may not be strong enough to uphold Jesus’s teachings. Or we fear that we are facing the world alone, after all.

I would like to focus my topic on being alone, because this is the scenario that I have been facing after I have first decided to face “the world system”, and continue doing so. By alone it means that, in this evil age, we are facing problems, troubles or challenges, mostly by ourselves. We may have friends, true friends that give us moments of “lift” in times of challenges. We may have family members who constantly remind us of their love to us. We may have our second half who keeps reminding us of the fact that he/she would never abandon us. And you may be fortunate enough to have a child who innocently continues to greet you with the words: “Papa, are you okay?”. But who can give the love that God can give you?

As compared to people who are homeless, or have lost their most treasured family members, I can say that I do have worries, but in a point of view much more fortunate than these people. However, living in this “world system”, I certainly feel the pressure around me, all the time. However, deep down, I know God is with me, and He is with me, in the most distressing period. I had sinned and had been naive and innocent before, but He never leaves me alone. I may want to cry because of other people’s deliberate abuse, but He sustains me. I may feel hopeless occasionally, but He gives me the feeling of assurance. And when I want to give up myself, He gives me courage. And most importantly, when I feel I am done, and want to stop using those “gifts” that He has given me to serve the world, He gives me the dreams and SUPPORT to keep me afloat, and the will to face the future.

I sometimes question myself on the issue of “for what”. What can I gain by doing good to “the world system”, in this world? All I have been getting are some negative reactions from people around me. Others laugh. They cheer. They make fun of me. But, not understanding me is not important, but more importantly is I understand them. They may be happy on the surface, they may seem successful in their look, but they do not know the true sources of happiness and successfulness. The relationship with God. The love He gives us. And the achievements and accomplishments that we gain and have when we work for and with Him.

The worldly wealth, power, status are normal people’s measurement of success. Their fame. And their source of pride. But they do not give you true happiness. Only when you know the truth, and have a relationship with God, and that He loves you, then will you feel the true happiness.

I had been through this journey before. I once was the best badminton player among schools in HK when I was young, and I had the experiences of being disheartened when I came out to face “the world system” alone. But I know I am not alone, after all. God is with me. He gives me strength and boldness to face the evil. He gives me sufficient to courageously face the world. And He communicates with me through the Bible and dreams to lead me along my journey. And most importantly, He gives us all, the grace of eternal life, which we all have to give thanks to Him.

For those younger readers or others who may not understand what I mean by “the true successfulness”, it is normal, and it takes time and most probably, and thankfully to Him, you will adjust. But just give yourself a try, pick up the Bible, and give yourself some space and time to build a relationship with God. Your whole life will be transformed, and blessed.

The Second Love System: 27.6.2018

Are you in love? Can you recall the previous moment when you had a strong lovely feeling? And the lovely feeling was so strong that moved you to act silly? Are you prepared to sacrifice because of love? Do you consider love and marriage as a transaction?

This morning before I woke up I had a dream. A nightmare as usual. A hopelessness dream. However, I knew God was with me, so I was not scared of any bad dreams that I had. Though I had to admit that I had sinned all the time, and so the dream did remind me that I had to be careful of sinning, and also I had to remind all the time to myself, that I had to repent. Admit my sin. Ask for forgiveness. And ask for mercy.

Just similar to a normal day, I did not have the expectation that I would feel the lovely feeling this morning. I was sitting on my office chair and working on the computer. It was an orderly morning and I didn’t feel any specific SUPPORT feeling. I was generally in a happy mood, but I considered that I was in the peace system. Then the feeling arrived around 11am. At that specific moment and for the following 30 minutes, I suddenly visualized myself in a loving scenario coupled with a strong, tender loving feeling. I visualized and felt that I was a young girl in love, and was about to take off my clothing to lose my virginity, for love. I was so shy, and so loved, to the extent that I did not have eye contact with the lover that was physically absent from this scenario.

And I was so touched and moved that I really enjoyed this period. It was one of the most wonderful, and loving feelings and I doubted that I had ever felt this loving feeling before, after around 10 years of marriage with my wife. The remarkable scenario was that the lover was not physically present in front of me, I could not visualize her, but the feeling flew inside my heart. I could not fully explain what had happened, but just that I believe it was God who gave me this feeling, which inspired me to write this post, and again had mercy on me and gave me this special experience.

Besides, I considered that I was in the “love system”, again, but today’s happening was totally different from my previous experience in the love and hate system. In the previous context, I was mentally wielding a power, with the SUPPORT, to overwhelmingly defeat the evil, I believe, all in my mind. Today I found out a different perspective, being in love and inside the love system is all about being passionate, giving away myself, in contrast to being inside the love system and fight a spiritual warfare. Inside this second love system, I was like willing to sacrifice myself, and give my most precious thing to the one I love, that was my wife.

Today’s experience was a forcefully loving feeling that moved me to give my precious thing, for love. If you had previously read my blog post, especially on 10th May 2018, I had made a “give all” decision to God, but on that occasion, I was not being “forced or moved” by the feeling that I had today. On that occasion, it was a conscious, and pure decision to act based on instinct, but today I was moved by love to act on this “give all” decision. All I could say was that I simply could not control myself, and I did not actually want to leave this lovely feeling, after all.

To me, love is not a transaction, but a give all or sacrifice. It is not only a loving and conscious decision to give myself to my lover, that is my wife, but also a forceful feeling which motivates, and leads me. Was it God who gave me this feeling to move me to act for Him, in the present and future context, to do His will?

The First Peace System 24.6.2018

Respect and praying on nature background

My previous post talked about a potential sacrifice if I am to strictly follow Jesus’s teaching. On that occasion, having declared this bold assertion, I cried. I was sentimental as I had once again chosen God instead of other worldly considerations, such as power, or health. And I know it was worth it.

This morning I had three dreams. Two of them were nightmare and in normal occassion they will affect my emotions, in a negative way. My mind will be like a “vacuum”, and I cannot function properly both in work and interaction with people. I can say that my mental state would be in the hate system, which involves the collapse of my mind, comprehensively. However, everything changed after my third dream today. It was a phase that I heard, “most loyal”. And then I woke up, and routinely I went to buy breakfast for my wife and son this morning. Instead of dwelling inside the hate system, I was in the peace system, and I felt calm, touching and affectionate. I nearly cried out as, I believe, God had given me the affirmation and a stamp of approval because of my “Give all” decision a few days before. His calling was that I was doing work, for and with Him, with an attitude of loyalty and sacrificing. And He rewarded me with a morale boost. I soon forgot every hardship and negative, adverse emotions and I was in the peace system, enjoying my time with God behind me. I was listening to music and was energetic, but clearly, I was not yet in the love system, as I only felt the love from God, but I did not sense or feel, I believe, the will of God to do anything at that time.

My conclusion is, to be working for and with God, is similar to an every minute job that we are facing every day. We do not clearly know in advance when, and why, but we are called upon, in my case, when I feel the SUPPORT from Him, I believe. And it will be an honourable job if we are to work for and with Him. Therefore, we need to prepare ourselves. We need to tune up ourselves. We need to make sure that we are in our best shape and condition before our work for and with Him. My reflection is that by strictly following Jesus’s teachings, and by admitting that we are willing to sacrifice for Him, are ways to avoid a lapse of relationship or guilt which might severely affect our mind in a critical scenario. We have to make sure that when the moment comes, our mind will not be affected by any major or minor failings before it. Today I had been “approved” by God, I believe, so that when the nightmare came this morning, they were beaten emotionally by a certain margin by His “approval” of me.

Readers may question that this might just be a coincidence, and not necessarily meant that we had to strictly follow Jesus’s teachings and sacrifice for God, in order that our work for Him could be done properly. All I could say was this assertion was once again “proved” by the sermon of the Priest on today’s Sunday Mass. He talked about we should strictly adhere to and remained firmly committed to our faith, and the teachings and way of acting from Jesus. He again taught us that we should be a loyal servant of God. This was what I was thinking these few days, and I firmly believe the priest’s assertions and my recent experiences were not only a coincidence, but God’s plan for me to realize that loyalty and strict following of the teachings remain important foundations and vital characteristics for doing work for and with Him.

I was in the peace system during most of this time. I believe I was not doing any particular work for Him at this time, but I was really touched by His mercy to me, namely His confirmation of me as a “loyal” servant of Him. This motivation further reminds me that I need to remain stern and firm when facing temptations, and unwavering do His job with loyalty. I believe these are two very important characteristics that we need to have in our daily lives, as preparations and serious attitude in doing His job.

The Journey: Give All Decision Part Two

Religious representation with cross on top of a hill

Are you ready to sacrifice everything just for strictly following Jesus’s teachings? Are you prepared to sacrifice yourself in order that the words of God and Jesus can be followed? I had one chance today, and I took the opportunity to clearly show to God that I love Him, and I am following Him, his words and his teachings, to the extent of sacrificing myself. I cried, and it was worth it.

The first thing that most people think of, when we are talking about sacrifice, is, “For What?“. One example that I can think of is, when you forgo your comfort zone, and give your seat to an old man in a train, “what is it for?” Obviously, you do it for the old man, giving your seat to him as he needs a seat inside the train. But more importantly, you are doing this because you follow Jesus’s teaching, by doing good for others, sacrificing your comfort zone in the process. Therefore if you have a paradigm shift and think in this way, sacrificing means giving yourself up in certain forms in order to achieve a higher purpose, for and with God, to help others as you would help your closest family members. Giving up a seat to sacrifice your comfort zone is easy, but are you prepared to sacrifice everything in order to follow Jesus’s teachings, in a strict way?

This morning I arrived at the office at 9:30am and soon we had a meeting. The meeting was about the usage of the new Accounting system and a representative was sent from the software house to our office to explain and answer our questions. All along, I was thinking of one thing, the thought of doing things right. I was talking to myself, “I will do the right thing, that God wills me to do, to the extent that I might need to sacrifice myself in the process.” Of course, I will not do anything that is harmful to others, like bombing a place, but I am willing to sacrifice myself, to the extent that I will do and practice the integrity, and righteousness that was taught by Jesus in the Bible. People may be thinking, life is short, let us enjoy our time, why indulge in helping others? My interpretation is: Life is short, let us do good to others, which makes our life meaningful. See Mark 9:35

Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, “Anyone who wants to be first must be the very last, and the servant of all.”

In this way, Jesus’s teaching was if we want to be first in our life, we need to have the heart of serving others, or as He said, the servant of all. We have to prepare to put aside our most immediate interests, to prepare to sacrifice our comfort zone, and truly, genuinely give ourselves away, to serve others. This is meaningful. And this is the right attitude in life. Forget about what you gain from others, but what you give to others.

And you know what, after I kept telling and reminding myself to do good and sacrifice myself (Giving all for God), I have already shown to Him that how much I love Him, as I am doing all these things to glorify Him. And having faithfully told myself that whatever happens, I will still keep His teachings and goodness in my mind and my actions, I cannot stop myself crying. I was sentimental not only because I had shown my utmost love to Him, but also because I had promised and had done my part and responsibilities as a loyal servant. I know I have done the right thing, make the right decision, and I will not regret any single moment, anymore. The fact that I can sacrifice myself for God makes our relationship closer, and makes myself bolder, and with strength. My heart and determination become stronger and stronger, and better prepared myself to face the possible harship or suffering if I am to do God’s will on earth. And this is my main purpose in life. What’s yours?

The Fifth Love and Hate System: 19.6.2018

Mid section of couple standing with hand in hand

I soon found out today that once I was in the hate system, I was powerless. And the only solution is to take a rest, preferably to sleep for a while, or wait for the help from God.

I had a great morning today, as I had full support all this while. I was energetic, enthusiastic, and worked with a flair that was better than most other mornings. However, I considered that I was not in the love system this morning, as I did not feel any special lovely feelings or visualization. However, the support this morning had already enabled me to enjoy the morning work with joy and dedication.

The tide turned in the afternoon. As usual, I took a nap after lunch, and during this period I had some five to seven dreams. One of them was a bad dream, and I knew instantly that it would affect my afternoon work, in a negative way. During the first hour of my afternoon work, I kept telling myself, “Don’t let the bad dreams affect me, don’t let the fear and hate consume me, try to use any suitable method to prevent myself from falling into the hate system.” Easier said than done, I was gradually being moved into the hate system. My mood and emotions were in negative territory, and the hate had risen from my heart to my head, and it affected my working ability and my communication with colleagues. At 4:30pm, I was fully in the hate system and I was powerless against it.

Reflecting on today’s happenings, all I can say is once I am moved or been “pushed” into the hate system, there is nothing I can do, except taking a rest or waiting for a miracle from God to happen. It would be very awkward to sleep while I was working, but the mental miracle did happen in the past, which I believe was from God, who “pulled” me out of the hate system and to the love system. But this miracle did not happen today, and I believe there must be a reason behind the previous time when he gave me a “pull”, which led me to the love system.

In conclusion, to my readers, forget about the mastery of fear or hate, and instead of trying to spend time and effort to conquer the hate, wisely use your time and energy when you are in love, i.e. inside the love system, and you will achieve your special role. And this special role is not merely a job you are doing for yourself, you are actually doing a job with God, I believe. When I am inside the love system, I know that God is with me, and most probably this time period, with the SUPPORT, God is overseeing me in doing a special responsibility I have to act for Him on earth. Similiar to a concert or an opera, you have already entered the arena, of the love system, are you prepared to act while there may be so many spectators cheering for you? Are you ready to use this precious time to do some once in a lifetime work with God? I am given the honour and the SUPPORT to act, are you prepared?

The Fourth Love and Hate System: 18.6.2018

human and love spirit powerful energy connect to the universe power abstract art watercolor painting illustration design hand drawn

Today marked another day of great SUPPORT, a big collapse and then followed by a sizable recovery.

I had dinner in Times Square Pizza Express with my mum tonight. And during this time, I had four extraordinary happenings. The first SUPPORT came after I had ordered the meal, I was filled with power and enthusiasm, and I knew I was wielding power in the peace system. After a while, the second SUPPORT arrived. I was very emotional, and I started to cry. I realized that the reason why I cried was that somehow, I believe, God was with me. And I felt his love today that in the past I had not felt before. I perceived I was in the love system, and I could not control my tears. On the third occasion, my tears had stopped, but I knew I was wielding a power and I visualize a big victory, something like 5-1, against the evil. The feeling was not as strong as before, but I knew it was enough to defeat the evil side, for a certain time. However, as I thought I had won the war against the evil up to now, I then had a reversal of feelings and the realization of the revenge of the evil feeling. Just by one thought, I mean one thought, my mind was moved into the hate system, and everything collapsed, in my mind. It was like jumping from a cliff and I felt I had lost the mental battle. This kind of circumstances had happened in the past, and normally I would suffer both physically and mentally while returning home.

However, today was very different and a milestone victory against the evil emotion and the physical attack. When I was walking to the MTR station to take a train, I felt the SUPPORT, and I knew I returned to the peace system from the hate system. All the while during the trip home, I felt the power and a miraculous physical healing which enabled me to properly function myself. This had not happened before as everytime when there was a collapse of mind when I was fully in the hate system, I couldn’t do anything to defend against it, and a certain doom would happen, and I was done for the rest of the time. However this time around, I was “pulled”, I believe, from God to the peace system and I had been healed from the physical attack.

Reflecting on today’s happenings, I believed that I was working for God, during the time when I had three times of SUPPORT with me. I was beaten by the bad emotion at the end of the meal, but that was not over for my work today. God gave me the SUPPORT, I believe, and I felt the power and energy at the time when I was returning home and when I took a shower after I went home. Even up to now, while I was writing this blog post, I felt the SUPPORT also. Truly, I had the great honour to have the SUPPORT and also working for God today, I believe.

The Second Love and Hate System: 10.6.2018

Holiday gift box or present with bow ribbon against blue bokeh background. Magic christmas greeting card.

Today marked another milestone on the further discovery of the love and hate system: The “pulling” out of the hatred system, the entering of the love system, and the wielding of power in the fight against evil by the given mental power, I firmly believe, from God.

Yesterday I had a very disturbing dream. It was similar in nature as to the one-worded nightmare I had heard, back in 13.10.2017 in which I had documented in this blog. See The First Support: 13.10.2017. However, I was fundamentally okay yesterday and I didn’t feel any worries or uneasiness, so to speak. However, When I accompanied my son to today’s music lesson at around 3 o’clock, I felt the full effect of the nightmare’s pressure. Similiar to yesterday’s happenings, I felt some bitterness and tension on the way home, and I was on the brink of stepping into the hatred system, involuntarily. As time went by, the pressure became stronger and stronger, and I was simply powerless to defend from its assault to my mind, and the stress was starting to fill up my whole body. The hatred then began to build up, and slowly it became more and more vigorous. I then arrived home. This assault lasted some 30 minutes, and all I can say was I still, luckily, had not fully entered the hatred system. I could not imagine how was the situation if I had fully entered the hatred system. However, the miracle then occurred. While I was at home in the dining room, I suddenly felt the SUPPORT again. I became energized and excited and I knew that I had been pulled out of the hatred system and entered the love system. I then sensed a victory of the love over the hatred, again, and it proved to be right. I told my wife I wanted to go out to buy something. And during this time, the SUPPORT was with me, and along the way, I was walking powerfully. I walked and walked, and along the way, wielding the given power like an actual participant in the fight against the hatred feeling and the system all these while. I knew I was powerless against the hatred system, but once I was led or pulled out of the hatred system, the situation, with the SUPPORT, then became an overwhelming victory against the hatred feeling. I was partly wielding the power, and at the same time, I knew, I was celebrating, because I knew the hatred was no match to the SUPPORT and I was honoured to be a witness and, I believe, I was a player in this initial match for the good against evil, in my emotion. And I returned home, I knew that the match was won, today, and I then had a peaceful dinner with my wife and son, and patiently but waiting with hope for the next, and the battle, with God.